Have you ever experienced a love/hate relationship with quilting? Shhh...I didn't say that did I? I never thought I would be saying this, but there are certain things about quilting that clash with my "personality" that can cause so much anxiety I get stuck in a rut. Makes me think of my little boy's book that says, "Help! Please Help! My truck is stuck." My brain gets stuck in the mud, I stall out, my stash grows bigger because I can't make anything, and before I know it I'm so overwhelmed I don't know where to start.
When I walked into a quilt shop 6 years ago, I was instantly hooked and went on a quilting RAMPAGE! I bought patterns and books, fabric and notions, and whipped out about 15 quilts in 12 months. I think it clicked with me because I am great at following directions. I was a math geek, and the symmetry and order of quilts drew me like Pooh is drawn to honey. I'd pick a design I loved then cut and sew with hopeful anticipation. I would put my baby to bed and run down to my sewing "cave" to get in every minute I could of quilting in. I could show my personailty through the fabrics and designs I picked so I got to be creative, without having to be creative, if you know what I mean.
So, what changed? Lots of life happened, but one thing that changed was my desire to be a better quilter. I am a perfectionist, so when things didn't come out perfectly, I would stress out. I have even picked out entire quilts that I quilted because I wasn't happy with them...even after many people would tell me I was crazy because they looked fine. I desired to make harder patterns, original works, and obtain skills that would allow me to quilt like the best in the business...a true Quilt Diva! Here's the problem...it's easy to improve and perfect skills, but it's quite difficult to become "artistic" when God didn't make me that way. Like I said, I was a math girl. I used the brainy side of my head. I wasn't like my mother and my daughter isn't like me. They're artistic. My mother would paint murals on our walls from the beautiful pictures she saw in her head. She could create and decorate with the best of them, and I always wanted to be like her, but I'm not. I can't "see" designs in my head. I can't bring to reality the masterpieces my heart wants to make. So, I wind up sitting for hours trying to figure out a quilting design or "original" pattern. This happened so many times I just got stuck in a rut and didn't quilt, sew, or create anything for over two years. I bought a Gammill and only put 23 hours on it in 4 years. Sound crazy? Yes...I think so too!
So, I think I just need to get back to doing what I love...finding a pretty pattern, picking the fabrics(somewhat impulsively), and just "knockin' em out!" If the quilts aren't perfect I'm probably the only one that will know...and who cares, eventually they'll probably wind up in a closet or on a dog bed somewhere anyway. LOL.
So, here's my next project. After finishing the quilt top about 3 years ago, it has sat on a shelf because I 1) was afraid to quilt it and "mess it up" and 2) had creative block wanting it to look like a masterpiece without the "master" skills. I'm just going to bite the bullet and use a pantograph so I can just get it done. I'm cringing, but a finished quilt is better than an unfinished one that would sit for another 3 years.
So, what do you think? How would you quilt this baby?
1 comment:
Please don't be a panto snob! A thoughtfully selected and well executed panto pattern can enhance many quilt designs. A lot of my quilt output is never intended to be an heirloom or a work of art. I want people to sleep under them, curl up in front of the TV in them and let babies teethe by chewing on the binding (one of my nephews - oh, yes, it happened). A cared for but well washed and worn quilt means they love it. For most gifts and many of my own quilts, I go panto because I'm not made of money and my longarm quilter is a major expenditure in my hobby. And she does a fabulous job with all kinds of quilting.
As for being stuck in a rut, I understand what you mean. I am a great interpreter but not so great a designer. So I made peace with that and with the fact that quilting is supposed to comfort me, not drive me nuts. I leave the complex patterns to the masters.
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